Red Shift in...
Fun Times With Dr. Cruise
By Rebel40000 (Cygnus Wing)

Starring...

*At Red Shift's secret HQ... wherever the Hell that is...*

Martyr: *eating Oreos*

Cygnus: Always eating those cookies, eh?

Martyr: *keeps eating*

Cygnus: You do know those are bad for your teeth, yes? They'll eventually rot and fall out of that little head of yours!

Martyr: *keeps eating*

Cygnus: ...

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: ...

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: ...So...

Martyr: ...I'm going to shove a bomb down your throat if you don't fuck off.

Cygnus: SAY WHAT!?

Martyr: *keeps eating*

Libra: *enters the room* Why is there an inbalance in the noise level in here?

Cygnus: *points at Martyr* He... he said something improper!

Vok: *rubbing neck* Improper? Reminds me of some things that Libra saw once.

Libra: *shudders*

Avi-W: I still want to know what this "improperness" is!

Avi-B: I don't think you do... maybe... yeah...

Libra: No, you do not want to know! It is the exact opposite of everything that is balanced! It-it...

Cygnus: Has everyone forgot about me?

Gemini: Poor Cygnus, not a man enough to take some small verbal abuse--*gets whipped*

Avi-W: Hey, peon! No one said you could talk! EVER!!

Gemini: Y-yes ma'am... *sniff*

Martyr: ... *gets up and leaves*

*Later that day*

Martyr: *grumble grumble*

Cygnus: Grumbling is not proper, you know.

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: Well?

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: ...

Martyr: *leaves*

Cygnus: Mr. Beneal, I believe I hate you.

Avi-W: *pops out of nowhere* Where the heck is he going!?

Avi-B: Maybe somewhere away from this insanity... maybe...

Avi-W: *smacks Avi B* Don't be silly! What's wrong with a little insanity? Huh? HUH!?

Libra: Everyone knows that a little insanity does not balance the rest of the sanity--

Vok: Stop saying balance. Or else.

Cygnus: *sigh* I need new teammates. Especially a new partner who isn't lousy and ungrateful in every shape and form. And fashion. Definitely cannot forget about fashion! That red coat absolutely must go.

Ophiuca: Hmph, at least you have a partner. I am forced to just sit... er, float here by myself.

Cygnus: I thought you had a partner?

Ophiuca: Er, uh... I do! She's just always in the bathroom, so she just might as well not be here! Hahahah...

Avi-W: OOOOKAY!!

Everyone else: ...?

Avi-W: I'm gonna chase after him!

Vok: ...Why?

Avi-W: Becaaaaaause we're not doing any kooky bad stuff right now.

Gemini: Wrong! We must be bad! Bad!!

Avi-W: Oh, be quiet you! I am bad! B-b-b-bad to the bone!

Everyone else: *sighs*

Avi-B: You better listen to her... she's telling the truth... yeah...

Cygnus: Whatever. I'll go, just for the sake of putting that fool in his place.

Avi-W: YAAAAY!!

*And with that, Avi W runs out the door, dragging Avi B with her in the process. Cygnus only stares before sighing and flying after them. Elsewhere...*

Martyr: *in front of a small building* ... *enters*

Clerk: Hello! Welcome to Dr. Cruise's Family Dentistry! How may I help you?

Martyr: ...

Clerk: I see. And your name?

Martyr: ...

Clerk: Mm-hmm... anything else?

Martyr: ...

Clerk: I see. Well, Dr. Cruise will see you shortly! Just sit right there. Okay?

Martyr: ...Idiot. *sits down*

*Outside*

Avi-W: Thus, we stalk our prey out in the plains, watching and waiting, ready to pounce--

Cygnus: The Hell are you going on about?

Avi-W: Shh!

Gemini: Yes, shh. Her stupidity is contagious.

Avi-B: So he's at some sort of... dentist place...?

Cygnus: Looks like I was wrong about him. It seems as though he does care about retaining his appearance!

Avi-W: Hee hee hee... and with this we can maim him!

Avi-B: That's not very nice...

Avi-W: Quiet, you!

Avi-B: Yes, boss...

*Inside*

Clerk: Mr. Beneal, the doctor will see you now.

Martyr: *enters*

Dr. Cruise: Why hello there!

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: What. Do. We. Have. Here? Is Mr. Beneal a good boy? Is he a goooood boy?

Martyr: ...?

Dr. Cruise: Yes you are! Now go sit down.

Martyr: ...Right. *sits*

Dr. Cruise: Open wide!

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: Oh, come on! You've gotta go AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!

Martyr: ...No.

Dr. Cruise: Please? With a cherry and REALLY FUCKING COOL SHIT ON TOP?

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: I've got Oreos.

Martyr: OKAY!!

*Outside*

Cygnus: Oreos? I thought that was... bad for teeth?

Gemini: Humans are stupid. We've learned this fact the hard way.

Avi-W: *slaps Gemini*

Gemini: Owowowow!!

Avi-B: *gets slapped as well* Wh-what did I do...? *sniffles*

*Inside*

Dr. Cruise: *inspecting Martyr's teeth* Uh-oh.

Martyr: ...?

Dr. Cruise: Uh-oh. UH-OH.

Assistant #1: What is it, Dr. Cruise?

Dr. Cruise: We've got some wiggidy wackness happening with teeth 12.32 and 46.953!! THIS MAN NEEDS A DOCTOR!! IS THERE A DOCTOR IN HERE!?

Assistant #2: I'm a doctor!

Dr. Cruise: Then go operate.

Assistant #2: But I don't wanna!

Dr. Cruise: WHO HERE WANTS TO OPERATE!?

Assistant #1: I want to operate!

Dr. Cruise: Then make that operate!

Assistant #1: *salutes* Sir, yes, sir! *to Martyr* Okay then, Mr. Beneal, are you ready? Just to let you know, I specialize in dissection. *pulls out a chainsaw* Texas-style!

Martyr: ...FUCK YOU!!

Assistant #1: SIR WE HAVE A BOGEY I REPEAT WE HAVE A BOGEY I NEED MEDICAL ASSISTANCE STAT!!

Dr. Cruise: You heard the man, he needs assistance!

Assistant #2: RAAAAAAAAAAAGGH!! *pulls out a cleaver*

Martyr: !? *dodges the cleaver*

*Outside*

Cygnus: ...Wow. Are all dentists like this?

Gemini: Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupi--

*Suddenly Assistant #2 goes crashing through the window, flying into the street*

Avi-W: *whistles*

Avi-B: Maybe we should split... yeah... That sounds good right now...

Avi-W: *takes off*

Avi-B: H-hey...! Don't leave me behind... *chases after*

Cygnus: What!? You cowards can't run away! ...Ah well.

*Back inside*

Assistant #1: *swinging the chainsaw about* Now, now... be a good little boy and let me operate on you!

Martyr: *dodges the weapon* No. *notices Cygnus* On Air! *transforms into Cygnus Wing*

Assistant #1: Ooh, pretty lights.

Martyr: Feather Storm! *unleashes a flurry of feathers on Assistant #1*

Assistant #1: OWWWWWWW!! *goes flying into a wall*

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: Heheheh... *rubbing hands* S-sorry 'bout that. We nuthin' but simple folk down here.

Martyr: ...Whatever. I hate dentists. *flies off*

Dr. Cruise: W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT!? Hates dentists, eh!? IT'S ON!! *shakes fist with ANGER*

*That night*

Vok: So, Martyr, how was the... *snickers* dentist?

Martyr: ...Your face.

Vok: Ouch, that one hurt. Probably not as much as that chainsaw did, though.

Martyr: ...

Libra: Vok, your logic is not in balance with the facts. I suggest that you--

Vok: And you need to stop saying that! It's getting annoying!

Martyr: *slips away toward his room*

Cygnus: *in his head* (Tired, I presume?)

Martyr: (What's it to you?)

Cygnus: (I was rather interested in how... well, messed up that dentist was.)

Martyr: (You're right. Maybe we should refer Blue Shift to him.)

Both: *laughs hysterically*

Martyr: (Whatever. It's all said and done, and I'm going to bed.)

Avi-W: Night!

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: ...How did you know what he was thinking?

Avi-W: I dunno! I'm just good at these guesses. Oooh, maybe I've got psychic powers! ESPN and all that.

Gemini: That's ESP.

Avi-W: Whatever! That N could stand for stuff like... nutmeg! I really like nutmeg.

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: Hmm... where is the other half of you?

Avi-W: Huh?

Cygnus: Aren't you two always together?

Avi-W: Good question! But you know, sometimes the most important things in life don't revolve around such trivial nonsense. You've gotta look beyond the basic limitations of the human mind to fully grasp the realization of these facts!

Cygnus: Er, right. Sorry.

Martyr: ...Bed. *slams the door in everyone's face*

Avi-W: Spoiled sport!

Martyr: *getting in bed* Good night and good riddance.

*As everyone climbed into bed... outside a certain someone was watching.*

Dr. Cruise: *holding binoculars the wrong way* Hah! Don't like dentists!? I'll show him! I'll make him know to love and respect me! Or maybe fear and... FEAR ME!! YEAH!! Oh yeah thanks for telling me where you guys are, btw.

Avi-B: *tied up* Mmph.

Dr. Cruise: All righty then! Time to get to work!

*Thus Dr. Cruise uses one of his fancy shmancy dentist drills to open the window to Martyr's room, where he slips in, pulling Avi B in with him. A few minutes later...*

Martyr: *snoring loudly*

Dr. Cruise: Rise and shine!

Martyr: *continues snoring*

Dr. Cruise: WAKE UP! *kicks him in the nads*

Martyr: FUUUUUUUCK!! *notices he's duct taped to the wall* What... the... hell...?

Avi-B: *right next to him* Yeah... I said that too...

Dr. Cruise: *putting some rubber gloves on* Okie-dokie then. Since you were such a meany today I'm gonna go all out on you! Time to put my years of dentisty stuff to work! So whaddya say!?

*Before Martyr can answer Dr. Cruise shoves a piece of plastic in his mouth*

Martyr: Gmph!!

Dr. Cruise: First, we has gots tah take x-rays! OF YOUR MOUTH! ...With lots and lots of radiation.

Martyr: FFFFFFF!!

Avi-B: I believe he said... no. Yeah...

Dr. Cruise: Well too bad! Because I wanna! So like... does that plastic in your mouth hurt? Does it make you want to go FUCKING INSANE AND GAG AND SHIT!?

Avi-B: I... can't answer that... *has a piece of plastic shoved in her mouth* OWWWWWFLGPH!!

Dr. Cruise: Oh? OH!? I heard an ow somewhere in there! Let's try that again. *grabs the plastic and twists it around*

Avi-B: *starts gagging*

Dr. Cruise: YAY!!!

*Dr. Cruise starts bouncing around uncontrollably, laughing to himself*

Martyr: *spits the plastic out* GAGH!!

Dr. Cruise: Gasp! So... you got it out. Tell me, did it tickle?

Martyr: ...No?

Dr. Cruise: GOOD!! *jams the plastic back in Martyr's mouth*

Martyr: *screams in pain*

Dr. Cruise: Now it's time for the best part... RADIATION!! *pulls out a small device* This baby'll hit you with so much radiation I guarantee you'll be bald in five seconds. *thumbs up*

Martyr: (Not the hair!)

Avi-B: (I wonder if my human self will only have half the amount of hair... yeah...)

Dr. Cruise: *points the gun at Martyr* PEW PEW!!

Martyr: MMMMMPHHHHHHHHHHHH!! *wets self*

Dr. Cruise: BWAHAHAHAHAH!! I made you wet yourself!

Martyr: *growls*

Dr. Cruise: Oh, relax kid. It's only lemonade! *throws a glass at Avi B*

Avi-B: Mmph! *gets covered in lemonade*

Dr. Cruise: Okay, now for part two. *takes the plastic pieces out* I'm gonna take a little, teensy weensy peek into your mouths and see what bad stuff I can find so I can make you feel like dirt!

Martyr: ...You did that.

Dr. Cruise: Did I?

Martyr: ...Yes.

Dr. Cruise: OH RIGHT!! THE WIGGIDY WACKNESS!! *smacks self* Duh! Okay, okay, time for a talk then. *pulls up a chair*

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: Once upon a time there existed plywood that was anti continental to the fabrication of the pearly whites. So that's when I, being the curious young adventuror that I am went on the epicly epic epicness of the quests to discover that the toy pieces that were mashed together had to be trimmed down with the power of the nail filer! With that I hit mach two and blasted off into the depths of the Earth where the little people who keep talking in my head tell me to do bad things with the pants of the dogs that go moo in the French cuisine dishes!

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: Do you understand my plight?

Avi-B: Actually... that did make a little sense... yeah...

Martyr: UGH.

Dr. Cruise: Now it's time for the final part in my dashing plan! *pulls out a tube* Pina colada?

Martyr: NO.

Dr. Cruise: Yes! *sticks to the tube in Martyr's mouth and turns it on*

Martyr: GAAAAAAAGH!! *mouth is filled with pina colada*

Dr. Cruise: ONOEZ!! Your teeth are dirty. Now I have to clean them ALL OVER AGAIN.

Martyr: *spits the pina colada and the tube out* ...N... N... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

*Suddenly the door breaks down*

Vok: What in tarnashin is going on in here!?

Avi-W: And why is my other half in here!?

Gemini: LOVE SCANDAL!! *gets slapped* Ow... only kidding...

Ophiuca: I think we're in for some trouble...

Dr. Cruise: Wooo... more patients! Heeheehee!!! *pulls out duct tape and edges toward Vok*

Vok: What the--Hey! Get away from me! Libra, Wave Change!

Libra: *merges with Vok into Libra Scales*

Vok: *spins his scales around*

Dr. Cruise: *steps back* OOooooooooOOOOOOOOoooooooh. Not a bad trick! *jumps in between the scales and tackles Vok*

Vok: Oof!!

Dr. Cruise: Now, meesa gonna operates on you! *applies duct tape*

Vok: AAGH!! *gets taped to the floor*

Ophiuca: Yes... definitely trouble. *flees*

Dr. Cruise: *gets up* Whoo... this dentist stuff is a tough job! But somebody's gotta do it. *looks at Avi W and grins* Say... weren't you on the wall?

Avi-W: I am! But I am also here! I am special.

Dr. Cruise: Very! For that I have a gift.

Avi-W: Oooh, really?

Dr. Cruise: *pulls out a drill* YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!

Avi-W: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!! *dodges the drill*

Vok: Shock him. SHOCK HIM!! Don't let that guy get away!

Avi-W: *jumps out the window and runs away*

Vok, Libra, Martyr, Cygnus, Avi-B, and Gemini: ...

Dr. Cruise: Whoops!! I let that one get away! Oh well. *turns to Vok* Are you ready for your examination!?

Vok: ...Have mercy?

Dr. Cruise: Let me think about it--No.

Cygnus: This is ridiculous. *merges with Martyr* (Take him out.)

Martyr: *breaks free the from the duct tape and tackles Dr. Cruise*

Dr. Cruise: WHAT A!?!?

Martyr: Swan Dance!! *starts spinning in place*

Dr. Cruise: That looks like fun! *mimics him* WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

Martyr: *stops and frees Vok and Avi B*

Vok: *gets up* Finally! What a weirdo!

Avi-B: He was shoving stuff in my mouth...

Vok: ...Not something you want to tell people.

Dr. Cruise: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! *spins out of control* HAAAAAAALP!! *goes flying out the window*

Martyr: *reverts back to normal* ...

Cygnus: What a disgraceful human! At least we managed to take care of him once and for all.

Vok: *also back to normal* That better be the case. If that crazy loon comes back and tries to tape me to the floor again I'll... say something nasty.

Gemini: That's a real man. Not. *gets slapped* OW. *sees Avi W* Where'd you come from!?

Avi-W: Blame my parents!

Avi-B: Yeah... pardon the bad joke...

Ophiuca: *comes back* Is he gone?

Libra: It would appear the balance between sane and insane is back.

Ophiuca: A simple yes or no would do, Libra.

Libra: But if I were to merely say "yes" then I would be neglecting the "no", thus resulting in a lack of balance!

Cygnus: Let's just say "maybe" then.

Libra: THAT MAKES NO SENSE NO BALANCE ARRRRRRRGH!! *runs out the room*

Avi-W: Anyway, I demand you all to clean this mess!

Avi-B: But... I sorta made it so we should both... *gets slapped* What she said...

Martyr: ...Feh.

Vok: Again, as long as he doesn't come back I'm good.

*Thus the team focuses on cleaning the mess Dr. Cruise made. By the time they're done it is early in the morning, and thus they all go to bed late, causing them to sleep in. Later that day...*

Vok: *in bed* Mmm... *hears someone pounding on the door* Go away... tryin' to sleep... *the pounding continues* S-stop... sleeeeep... *more pounds* Urrrrgh...

*The pounding keeps going for five more minutes. Vok tries in vain to block the noise out but eventually finds himself getting up, incredibly irritated.*

Vok: *to Libra* Libra, SHUT UP!!

Libra: *rubbing eyes* Your insult and target are not balanced. I would suggest looking elsewhere...

Vok: Grr... who could be knocking at this time of the day (nevermind it's already 12 PM).

*Vok heads toward the base's main entrance, where someone is pounding on the door behind it. With Libra right behind him he slowly opens the door...*

Dr. Cruise: YIPEE!! Awake, you are!

Vok: ZOINKS!! IT'S THE CREEPY OLD GUY!!

Dr. Cruise: *tackles Vok* Ohohoho!! Somebody's not being very silly! *pulls out a pacifier* I am angry!

Vok: What the--*gets the pacifier in the mouth*--Mmph.

Dr. Cruise: Ha-tcha! *gets up* Unfortunisticly, you are not my target. I am on the journey of proving myself to the man of oreo love, you see. *nods to self* Yes, therefore I must hurry on and show off my 1337 skillz of dentist-like stuff! Where exactly is his room?

Vok: *points*

Dr. Cruise: BUT OF COURSE!! *lightning strikes* Thankee, kind sir. *bolts to the door*

Libra: *helping Vok up* Should we not stop him?

Vok: *takes the pacifier out* ...Nah. Let's go get some McDonald's or something.

*In Martyr's room...*

Martyr: *covering ears from the pounding*

Dr. Cruise: *on the other side of the door* LEMME IN PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!

Cygnus: He must really want to clean your teeth.

Martyr: ...Shut your damn face. He already cleaned my teeth... twice.

Cygnus: Well, no wonder! Look at those choppers. All caked with Oreos... no wonder he needs to clean them multiple times! In fact I think I'll just... *reaches for the door*

Martyr: ...You wouldn't dare.

Cygnus: *grabs the handle*

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: ...

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: *opens the door*

Dr. Cruise: *explodes onto the scene with firecrackers* HELLOOOO THERE!! It's time for the super squeaky super awesome squeaky super awesome awesome squeaky super squeaky awesome squeaky CLEAN TEETH TIME!!

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: *pulls out a tube* Pina colada?

Martyr: ...Fuck.

Cygnus: *slips out the door and closes it* Serves you right.

*The entire base can hear the sound of Dr. Cruise laughing hysterically as he "operates" on Martyr. A few hours later and Martyr goes flying out the door in a full-blown body cast.*

Martyr: *crashes into the wall*

Vok: *eating a burger* Hey Martyr. Want a burger?

Martyr: ...

Vok: I'll take that as a "no", then. *reaches for another but can't find one* Where is my other burger?

Libra: *throwing the wrapper away* I... I needed to have a second one! One is an uneven number and we only bought three, and I just couldn't bare to be unbalanced in what I eat...

Vok: Ahahaha. Oh Libra. *puts arm around him* I'm going to kill you in your sleep.

Martyr: ...

Avi-W: *playing some fighting game* Punch him. PUNCH HIM!!

Avi-B: *also playing* I dunno... I think we're cheating... I mean, no matter what we'll still win... *gets slapped* Sorry...

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: *pecks Martyr*

Martyr: ...

Cygnus: Hmm, well. Not exactly the most fashionable of appearances. I suppose it will have to do. *sighs*

Dr. Cruise: MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

Vok: ... *cranes neck* IT'S HIM!! *jumps behind the couch*

Gemini: That explains the failed attempt at an evil laugh! Seriously... what the hell?

Avi-W: *slaps Gemini* Quiet! I'm playing. *jams controllers* Almost, almost, ALMOST!!

Dr. Cruise: *sees the two Avi's playing* Zubulugafawhat? This is no good! *pulls plug to tv*

Avi-W: HEY!! I was playing that!

Avi-B: What she means to say is... uh... we're pissed?

Gemini: ...Why did you end that with a question mark?

Avi-B: I dunno... I'm not used to this whole "evil" thing... yeah...

Avi-W: *slaps Avi B* I'm talkin' to you, Tom Cruise!

Vok: *behind the couch* Avi, that's not FUCKING TOM CRUISE!!

Dr. Cruise: Actually, my name IS Tom Cruise.

Vok: ...What.

Libra: You need to end your sentences with question marks when needed, Vok. It causes the entire structure of your phrases to be unbalanced.

Vok: No.

Libra: Again, that--

Dr. Cruise: Yes, I am Dr. Tom Cruise, and this is what I have to say...

*Suddenly the room goes dark with a spotlight on Dr. Cruise*

Dr. Cruise: Tom Cruise says: GO BEAT YOURSELVES UP!!

Avi-W: Okay! *punches Avi B over and over*

Avi-B: Ow! No! Stop, please! *runs around in circles*

Cygnus: Of all the ridiculous...

Dr. Cruise: Tom Cruise says: YOU'RE UGLY AND NO ONE LOVES YOU!!

Cygnus: ...*cries hysterically*

Martyr: ...

Dr. Cruise: Tom Cruise says: I'M AWESOME!! BOW TO ME!!

Libra: *bows* Good morning!

Vok: Libra, what are you doing?

Libra: *bows* Good morning!

Cygnus: *bawling* OH GOD IT'S AWFUL!! AWFUUUL!!

Martyr: ...

Gemini: Could someone please just take care of this moron?

Libra: *bows* Good morning!

Vok: ...Which moron?

Gemini: ...All of them.

Vok: Sounds fair to me. C'mon, Libra!

Libra: *bows* Good morning!

Martyr: ...

Vok: ...

Avi-W: ...

Avi-B: ...

Cygnus: ...

Gemini: ...

Martyr: ...Quit copying me.

Vok: *ignoring Martyr* No, seriously Libra, let's do this. WAVE CHANGE!!

Libra: *bows* Good morning!

Dr. Cruise: Tom Cruise says: VOK IS A LOSER!! NO ONE CARES ABOUT HIM!!

Vok: Osnap, I just got told. Guess I'll go act emo n' shit. *leaves*

Avi-B: *stops running around* W-why Dr. Cruise...? Why...?

Dr. Cruise: BUST A MOVE!! *starts dancing*

*As everyone watches in horror as Dr. Cruise seemingly continues his monsterous ways, the good(?) doctor suddenly screams in pain until collapsing onto the floor. Everyone can only blink in stupidity over what just happened.*

Gemini: *blinks in stupidity over what just happened*

Avi-W: *slaps Gemini*

Gemini: OW!!

Vok: Sooo... what just happened?

Ophiuca: *appears behind Dr. Cruise* Hmm... the 42nd one today... why can't any of these worthless humans properly Wave Change with me?

Vok: Probably 'cause you've got teh boobies. *gets slapped* OWOWOW!! IT WAS A JOKE DAMNIT!!

Gemini: Why are you trying to Wave Change with him anyway? What about your host?

Ophiuca: *panicking* I-It's always a good idea to have a backup, y'know!

Cygnus: *with a hankie* Sniff... so... what should we do with the body?

Gemini: We need to dispose of it, of course!

Ophiuca: He's still alive, you know. He only fell unconcious when I tried to Wave Change with him.

Libra: We must dispose of the body with care. If we neglect the balance between brilliance and stupidity we will be caught.

Ophiuca: No, seriously, he's not dead.

Vok: Eh, let's just throw him into the dumpster out back.

Avi-W: Sounds good to me! *whips Avi B* Take that body away!

Avi-B: Ow! *grabs the body and runs*

Ophiuca: But... ugh, I give up. *leaves*

Avi-W: *chases after Avi B* Faster, FASTER!! *more whipping sounds to be heard*

Gemini: *follows*

Vok: Right, well, I'm hungry again. Let's head on out to Subway, Libra. *leaves*

Libra: First McDonalds and now Subway? Do you have any idea how unbalanced those two choices are? *follows*

Cygnus: Hmm... I heard Subway has a nice diet plan going. A perfect plan for one such as myself! *follows*

*Eventually the only person left is Martyr, still in a body cast, on the ground.*

Martyr: ...

*As he lays there, silent, a fly lands on his face.*

Martyr: ...

*The silence grows.*

Martyr: ...

*Silence.*

Martyr: ...I want you to rot in the depths of Hell, you miserable fly.

*And thus the fly burst into flames.*

- The End -